The Best Things in Life.
They say the best things in life are worth waiting for. Whoever wrote that clearly didn't have to wait 4 years and counting for that thing to happen. But, in a way it makes sense. The wait gives us perspective, teaches us patience, helps us realize how badly you really want something and what you are willing to do to get it. It teaches us strength, strengthens our faith, and in that faith leads us to a stronger marriage. We've experienced this cycle over and over again for 4 long years now.
I know I've been away from this blog for a while. My plan is to catch everyone up in the upcoming weeks to where we are today. I took a break in May because of the fertility treatments we were trying...hoping that we would finally get to update this with good news...that lead to a surgery, which lead to more treatments, that spilled into the holidays that ended with another surgery. I have to say 2015 was a little hard on us, and 2016 has started with quite the bang.
Here's the crazy thing though, Rob and I have never been closer. There is just something about shared pain that links two people together. After this many years we could have given up on a baby, on each other, on our faith, the list goes on. In life we have choices. The one that is always meaningful to me is you can get bitter or you can get better. You choose.
Every day we choose to get better. This doesn't mean we don't have tough days. We have days where we cry, scream in frustration, beg for mercy for this to stop, question why it's happening to us, afraid this cycle will never end, question what we've done wrong. You can see that this dark path is tempting. Feeling sorry for ourselves could be very easy. Then from the pain comes a promise from God, for all the hurt we've felt he's shouldered our burdens a hundred times over. Faith is why we still have not lost hope. Faith is why most days we're not afraid of what's next but ready to stand up to our fears and face them head on.
If you would have asked me in 2011 if I was strong enough to survive 7 failed IUI's, 4 surgeries (between Rob and I), an autoimmune diagnosis and 2 failed IVF's and still have faith and a strong marriage I would have been afraid for us. I'd never been tested like that before and would have never known the strength we both have inside of us. Now I will tell you this. No matter the road, no matter the time, no matter the pain we will be parents. 2016 we're coming for you!
With bated breath.
